Why I Didn't Join a Sorority in College - Honestly Hannah

Why I Didn't Join a Sorority in College


Hi friends! I hope you're having a beautiful start to your week. Today I wanted to talk about something a little bit different - something a bit more personal. I was really hesitant to make this post because I truly don't want to offend anyone, even though I have absolutely nothing negative to say about sororities. In fact, there are SO many positive things about them! Keep on reading to find out more about why I chose not to join one in college though.

As a college junior at a school where Greek life is HUGE, I felt like it was time for me to talk about this. With it being college application season, I've received some messages from girls asking me about sororities. I'm not in one and I never "rushed" so it's hard for me to answer questions relating to sororities. All I have are a few reasons why I personally didn't think it was for me.

HUUUUUGE DISCLAIMER: This is NOT me in any way trying to bash sororities. I have absolutely nothing negative to say about them. In fact, I know they can be super empowering for some young women and I totally commend and respect that 100%! I'm just sharing my experience and why I decided not to.

So, I go to a school where Greek life is kind of a big deal.

When I was a freshmen, instead of being asked "are you going to join a sorority?" it was more of a "which sorority are you interested in joining?/what is your top choice house?"

I remember feeling so left out at the beginning of freshmen year, and that's why I started considering it - I honestly wanted to fit in. So many sweet girls that I had become friends with wanted to join one, and I figured I should give it a shot too. I was afraid I'd lose their friendships if I didn't rush. But this brings me to my first reason.

The only reason I was considering joining was because it seemed like everyone else was.

When I told someone I wasn't rushing, they usually gave me a strange look, and I started to feel like I didn't belong at all. I specifically remember going to my boyfriend's dorm room one day and just crying because I felt so left out of the whole sorority thing. I felt like I was going to have no friends since everyone I knew was going to be invested in Greek life.

So there, I started to consider it. I was talking to my then roommate at the time and she reminded me that if I wasn't interested in Greek life until I found out everyone else seemed to be, why should I do it?

It was then that I realized that the only reason I was thinking about joining was because everyone else seemed to be. Before coming to college, the thought of joining a sorority never really crossed my mind. I know some girls dream about joining a sorority in college, and it's something that they look forward to.


The best advice that I have is to not just do it because everyone else is. One huge thing I've learned so far in college is that you can't care about what other people think of you. This is your time. I truly regret feeling so embarrassed that I didn't want to rush. Like... What a waste of energy and stress.

Now as a junior, I have friends that are in sororities as well as friends that aren't. While I felt really left out at first, I've realized over time that it's not really a barrier between friendships. Most people in college are so nice and accepting that it doesn't really matter if you're in a sorority or not!

The amount of social obligations didn't seem to fit with my personality.

Formals, socials, recruitment, etc. There's no doubt that sorority life is jam packed with events. It's completely true that the social aspect of college is just as important as the academic aspect - yes, agreed. I've definitely said this before, but I'm a bit of an introverted-extrovert.

What the heck is an introverted-extrovert? How does that make any sense?

Growing up, I was super introverted. As I've gotten older, I've become a lot more outgoing. I love being around people, but here's where the introverted part comes back. As much as I enjoy being around people, I also enjoy alone time. I don't necessarily like to have plans every single day of the week. I'm the type of person that likes to recharge.

I know you probably don't have to attend every social event when you're in a sorority, I just kind of knew that the sorority life wasn't really for me. As hard as I tried to want to be in one, I just couldn't see myself really loving it.

It's super expensive.

This is probably one of the biggest reasons I shied away from joining. Since I wasn't completely in love with the idea, I didn't want to be spending the high amount of money on dues. College is already expensive, and for me, to add on that extra expense for something that I knew I wasn't passionate about just wasn't the way I wanted to do college.

If you're incredibly passionate about joining a sorority, the money may be totally worth it for you! I understand that, and I think if you're passionate about being part of a sorority, you should do what you can to be able to pay for it and enjoy your time! However, if you're not passionate about it, shoveling out that extra money might not be the best use of your hard earned money.

I just had a gut feeling that it wasn't for me.

Listening to your gut in college is what it's all about. If something makes you uncomfortable, or you know deep inside that something isn't right for you, you're probably right.

I really listened to myself on this one. I tried and tried to scrape together reasons why I might want to be in a sorority, and no matter how hard I tried, it didn't feel authentic. One of the BEST things about college is that you have the opportunity to make your own decisions and do the things that make YOU happy.

I knew joining a sorority wasn't going to make me happy, and I knew that it wasn't something I needed to do for me.

Was it weird freshmen year when it seemed like "everyone" was rushing? Yes, honestly. But is it weird now? Not at all. As I said, I have friends that are in sororities and friends that aren't, and I love them all!

I have zero regrets about not joining a sorority, and I'm proud that I was able to listen to myself and realize it wasn't for me.


NOW, if you're in a sorority, pleeeease leave in the comments all the wonderful things you love about it! I know there's so many benefits and I would love to hear your favorite things about being in a sorority.

If you aren't in a sorority, leave in the comments why you decided against it! Do you ever feel left out?

Thanks for reading as always, much love to all of ya xo



3 comments

  1. Hi!
    I loved this post. I was in a sorority up until about a week ago. I'm so glad you decided to post this while I was going through the dis-affiliation process with my sorority. It made me feel so much better about not being a part of Greek Life.
    I found your blog about a year ago and I absolutely love it. I would love to email you about a few things if that's okay with you!
    Best,
    Caroline.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Caroline! What a sweet comment:) I'm so glad my post brought you comfort! I so appreciate your support xo

      Delete
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